What did they carry?

The soldiers carried many things, that of memory's of home and of loved one's and that they may not be home to see them. They carried that of burden and of sacrifice that they must be hero's for their country and for themselves. They carried Love, lust, hate and remorse of their time in Vietnam, the love of the feelings the lust for blood, reward and accomplishment the hat of themselves for a fallen comrade and the remorse of the measures taken to protect their land and home. Most of all they carried themselves, they were forced to carry all of these things and many more inside and outside of themselves, and it seems to me the one's that would carry it all on their sleeves would be the ones that would get through this all and not the ones who pretend that they love the kills and the death and the terrorism that it is to be at war in a foreign land.
Ted Lavender was a scared individual, he needed drugs to keep him calm. I cannot say he is the only person that has ever suffered from this affliction, as a man at war he knew that scruples were that of which you could not carry with you for a weak man is a man who gets killed, as he did. He was one of the lucky ones as far as i am concerned, to not have to experience all of the turmoil and grief which is caused through the war and get to experience the loving embrace of death and get to experience the ethereal dream that will undoubtedly happen to all of us one day. Ted Lavender is that of a man that was not scared of the war but scared of himself, he did not want to have to live with himself and death was the greatest thing he could have bestowed upon himself.
THE NOVEL, THE MOVIE AND THE RESEARCH ALL GO TOGETHER BECAUSE THEY ARE ALL BASICALLY ABOUT THE SAME THING.